Undescriable..

I love my ex..I dont deny it.I really do.But somehow,no matter how I love him, I broke up with him..I dont know how he does it but he really wants to erase me out of his life..yet he put our pic together in fb..I know I'm being selfish but he was my friend,the closest one since I dont have many frens..The reality is he was part of my life and he will forever be coz he is..I even dreamed before that I would settle down with him..

Was I being cruel to him??I did have this thought whether I did the right decision..hell yeah I cried a lot..I miss him so much..I broke up with him,my first bf after 4 years of courtship..I realized that I am so lonely..but I was hurt so much..I had this insecurities that I tried to deny..countless heartbreaks n fights that were never solved coz he  never want to talk!!I tried so hard to keep our relationship apart but it takes two to succeed....

It's been 3months and a week since the breakup..I'm opening a new chapter in my life..I try to be strong eventhough I know it will be difficult..

I was given a new hope after the breakup with a man I barely knew eventhough I knew him way back then but...too many confusions and questions to be answered..yet I'm hoping as usual..I dont know..Perhaps now I need some good sleep rather than crack my head open..sweet dream y'all..

zzzzzz.....................zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......................

btw,I bought a new clock today.It's digital,big and it's new..so thats means I have a clock in my room again which will make my life way much easier since I dont have to look to my hp,my watch in order to check on times when I'm in my room.So,a good news I supposed??haha!!